When we are too concerned with success and fear failure, we are nevertheless heading in the opposite direction of positive results. Our mind starts telling us, “you must try harder,” turning us into completely unsatisfied individuals, never content with what we have and always striving for better outcomes; that’s when our brains start making healthy connections and thus, hinders our sense of authenticity and creativity.
1. You Can’t Define Perfectionism Without Being Subjective
As for almost any word you wish to describe, perfectionism cannot be defined in one specific way either. It involves a subjective perspective – what might be perfect for me, might be quite imperfect for you. Thus, it’s important to recognize this difference of opinion and pay attention to how you describe perfectionism.
After you found your definition, think about the reasons behind striving for perfection. Here are some questions that might help you figure it out:
- Why do I feel the need to become perfect in my actions? Come up with at least three reasons, essay writers Johanna and Kimberly recommend.
- Take every reason separately on another sheet of paper and write down what would happen if you wouldn’t achieve “perfection.”
- Then ask the traditional “so what?!”, followed by a breakthrough question.
Here’s an example: I must be perfect to be productive, maintain my high self-esteem, and become successful in life. If I were not productive, I would fear losing control over my actions and work. So what? If I lose control, I become anxious and scared of my future. So what? My future defines who I am. And here comes the breakthrough question. Really? Does your future really define who you are? Or do you define who you are by controlling the present? Do this with every reason you came up with and find the real cause beneath your perfectionism – most of the time, it’s the fear of losing control, which tells something about yourself, one way or another. As a wise man once said, “Know
thyself!” (and you’ll conquer the world).
2. You Will Become Anxious and Concerned
“There are pros to being a perfectionist. It can indeed help you finish tasks on time, stay on top of your work, and get amazing grades,” writes BestEssay Director, John Cullen. And he’s right; perfectionists will stay motivated for classes and encourage themselves to self-improve constantly.
However, on the other side of the story, it will create negative self-evaluations and thinking, factors that can easily lead to anxiety. And let’s face it: when you’re anxious, you cannot create now, can you? Being constantly concerned about “not failing” will decrease your chances of success because you will not be able to think outside the box and thus, thrive in whichever it is that you are doing.
3. Letting Go of Fears Is Important
You might not realize this, but perfectionism might be a disguised fear of judgment. When you care too much about what other people think, you’ll get in trouble. “I know many writers who’ve compared themselves to others along the years and thus, never published,” argues essay reviewer Christie Stewards. “They fear that they’ll fail so they never even try, regardless of their potential success. But what could happen if they did? Nothing wrong, in my opinion; they fail, they must try again, right? There’s nothing wrong in that,” ends Christie.
Here is some quick advice that might help you let go:
- Develop self-love and compassion; try meditation at least once per day and stay attuned with yourself; become self-aware and live in the present moment. Understand that there is no superior and inferior when it comes to existence; we’re all in the same boat, but some simply put in more effort.
- Accept yourself for who you are without trying to change; if you are indeed not satisfied with who you are, then change, but take constant, small steps and always ask “why.” If you are doing it for the wrong reasons (that means, not for yourself but for others), you will not be authentic.
- Admit your jealousy, if you feel any. Face your feelings and accept them rather than reject them. Then, work with them; understand that you are not your feelings; feel them, but don’t become them.
- Give credit to the people you admire. They did a great job pursuing something you are also passionate about – good for them! Wouldn’t you be blissful to see other people happy for you?
Practice meditation and self-love every day. Keep a journal and write down your feelings; try to do this at the end of each day. Analyze yourself, love yourself endlessly and you’ll see how your creativity will flourish.
Remember to stay true to yourself and accept your feelings. Understand that perfectionism is subjective and might be a form of disguised fear of comparison. Become self-aware thorough introspection and meditation; keep a journal, it will help. Smile, and move on! There’s no such thing as failure. There’s only learning to be done and then success to be achieved.
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