I want to tell you about one of the times I realized it was time to give to myself, and not just to others.
I had several smaller moments earlier, but this was probably the first big one. I had been running myself ragged trying to keep up with everything after having my daughter, and I hit a point where I felt I just couldn’t do it that way anymore.
I was working full time, I was doing every bit of housework, and I had been taking care of my daughter pretty much on my own. I went to my doctor and spoke to him about not having the energy to work full-time anymore, and we decided that I’d try reducing my workload by 10%. This was the biggest gift I could give myself at that point in my life. It meant I got a full hour to myself, alone, every day. This worked wonders for my energy level and my mood. It also meant I was exercising more, since I spent that hour walking, for the most part. If you’re in a similar place, I advise you to take action now, so you can give to yourself as well.
Linda, we all come to a time when we realise we need to look after ourself first to be able to look after others. You’re lucky you realised this so early. Others feel they should be supermum and continue on, but would really achieve more long term to follow your example.
Early? I’m 41 😀 Well, I did realize it earlier than this year, but I’m no teenager.
Thanks Lorelle 🙂
This is a wonderful message Linda. Self care is so important for our minds, bodies and souls. Everyone deserves at least an hour a day to just do something for themselves.
Thanks Keri, yes it is
Linda, making time to recharge your batteries is an important part of time management. As is learning to say “no” to good things that get in the way of better things.
Your doctor was wise to suggest the reduction in your workload!
Yes it is 🙂 He suggested it after some pressure from me 😀 I learned long ago that if I’m to get what I need from the doctors, I have to know what I need and demand it 🙂
I know I need to give to myself more and I am constantly saying that I do, but I know better.
I give freely to others, but rarely give freely to myself. I can’t even remember the last time I went shopping for new clothes. Ugh… I really need to change that. 🙂
Thanks for the wonderful kick in the rear! 🙂
Time to make the change. One advice; start small. That way it’s easier to continue and make it a habit, instead of a one off deal.
Hi Linda! I too have run into this many times in my life. I have had to take similar action. We often give so much of ourselves as women that we forget that if we do not give to ourselves as well, that we will not have enough to give to those we care about.
Thank you for sharing.
Missy Bell
http://www.PeaceAndHappinessProject.com
http://www.WhereTheGhostsLive.wordpress.com
Yes, it almost seems to be built into us. I suspect it’s society more than genetics though.
That is a great tip! It can make a huge difference. We all need that “me” time.
Thanks, yes we do.
Great post Linda! Giving to yourself is the best gift ever! You have to feel your best in order to give your kids your best. That’s what I now go by with my 4 kids…it keeps me sane! No more superwoman mentality for me!
If Mom’s not happy, nobody’s happy. I started having kids very late, and I don’t think I’ll have another. If I had started younger, I might have had the energy for it. Super Mom (as she’s portrayed by media) is impossible, espeically when you have 4. I’d say any Mom that’s good to her kids is Super Mom 🙂 And being good to them includes teaching them to set boundaries.
It’s important for women to take time for themselves. We’re expected to be everything to everyone all the time.
I’ve said the same thing… “If Mom isn’t happy no one is.” I forget this sometimes.
Yes, it is. The more people saying it, the bigger the chance of it sinking in.
Wonderful post! I applaud you for taking the initiative to take care of yourself! You were mindful and aware of what was contributing to feeling run down and you made a change to better your self-care practices. I hope this inspires others to do the same because really, we are our own best advocates and healers!
Thanks 🙂 I hope so too
Good to hear Linda that you found a way to relieve some of the pressure and stress from your daily routine. It is easy to get caught up in the role of being superwoman but if we let ourselves get rundown or ill then we are not good to anyone else anyways.
Have a great weekend, and relax 😉
It’s very easy 🙂 Have a great weekend you too. Me and my daghter are going for a girly day in the city tomorrow.
That hour is so important for your sanity! I don’t have kids yet but I function on doing as much as I can before my eyes close on me and I know that if I set aside even 20 minutes for myself a day I’d be in better spirits! Thanks for the reminder!
#ImEveryWoman
Yes it is 🙂 I intend to keep reminding you 😀
Linda, I agree. It is easy to forget how important it is to get some time by yourself now and then where you have time to reflect. Thanks for reminding me. I will get myself a gift tomorrow! 🙂
Let me know what you get 🙂
You’re so right! And really what is an hour? I have implemented “No Work” evenings twice I week, but I find myself run ragged the other 5 days of the week. One hour…sounds like a plan!
An hour is a very small amount of time in a life, but makes a world of difference
This is so critical, Linda! So good for you to realize that and step back to take action. If we don’t take care of ourselves we cannot be there for others either 🙂 It all starts with us.
True 🙂 Too many forget to take care of themselves.
It’s progressed since then. I’m now on disability, running my days myself. Well, at least until the others get home 😀 There are still a few things that have to be done each day. Can’t really drop getting my daughter ready for school 🙂
This is such a wise post. Sometimes it’s so hard to take time for ourselves, but if we don’t we risk burning out and then we’re no good to anyone. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks 🙂 I’m trying to knock it into their heads before they burn out
I think this particularly pertains to many women. We give, give, and give some more. We take care of everyone and everything before we do ourselves. The thing is, we have to take care of ourselves first, so we can give our best to others. I just realized this a couple of years ago. I still have to remind myself from time to time. Thank you for the reminder! 🙂
Yes, it does. It’s how we’re raised by society. It’s up to us to re-program our brains.
I’ll keep reminding you 🙂
Isn’t it amazing to think that 10% of a day is an hour – AND – that 10% can make such a huge difference in your life! Kudos for you for asking for help and implementing!
Thanks 🙂 I’ve got more than that hour now, since I don’t have a regular job anymore. Feels great.
So true! We all need to give ourselves a break from time to time, especially if we have kids! As much as we love them, they are a lot of work! Juggling, home, work, kids, spouse – it all takes it’s toll. Glad you are taking some time for yourself! You deserve it.
Thanks 🙂 I wish more women would do the same
What an amazing gift to yourself, Linda. I love that you recognized the need, and love even more that you took action to take care of yourself. I hope other women will take note, and gift themselves with what they truly need.
Peace.
I hope so too. It’s my mission to make women get out of overgiving and overwhelm and start caring for themselves.
I’m always in need of some me time but I don’t get around to it. I can’t even go to the bathroom without someone knocking on the door and asking what I’m doing….my answer is…”are you serious”.
Yep, I think if we abruptly took some time off everything would go crap. We are the glue that holds everything together!
I’m glad you realized you needed the time off. Sometimes it takes a lot of crap to happen…we need that push to make us take a break :).
Thanks for sharing this post with us! Have a great new week :).
Everything doesn’t go crap 🙂 I’ve done it. You need to set some boundaries, and take some time to yourself. The easiest is taking time after the kids are asleep. If the husband doesn’t respect that you need time, he needs a reality check 😀 Start with 5 minutes. I bet you can do 5 minutes a day, without everything falling apart. When it becomes a habit, you can expand on it.
Have a great week, and remember to press pause 🙂
Someone once said that to be “responsible” you have to be “response Able”–able to respond. The best way to be able to respond to the needs of others is to take care of ourselves. Take the time to keep yourself healthy so that you are able to be responsible!
Yes 🙂 That’s what I try to make others understand. I slip up sometimes, but in general, I’m pretty good at it.
Visiting from Blog Formatting. Women are the worst at taking time for themselves. Well, maybe not all women, but this woman. It has taken me years to learn that I need to do just that. And I do it more and more every day. Thanks for the reminder. I sure hope more women listen and don’t wait until they are in their 50s to follow this advice.
Not all, but too many. I’m glad you’ve been able to do that. I’m on a mission to get as many women as possible to do this, before they hit the breaking point.